I am guilty once again of blog abandonment.....so now instead of 1 blog to abandon I have 2 now hehehe so lets see if I can keep them both going.
Life as we know it as continued to plod along slowly since my last post, work still isnt great and in abundance but we are getting by.....I have gained weight grrrrrrrrrrr I am so mad at myself I worked so hard to lose 20 kilos a few years ago and blink blink and its back and its brought a couple of mates with it.....BUT I have had 2 more children since I did do the dramatic weightloss thing annnnnnd it was 10 years ago so it was more of a nap than a blink I suppose but I am still pissed. But I am sick of looking in the mirror and seeing the fat chick looking back at me I hate the tuckshop lady arms, the bubble butt and dont get me started on the muffin top I have going on on my back (dont ask) I feel like crap and I feel old and ugly which is why I started the Yummy Mummy project to try and inspire me to start to do more for myself and about myself inside and out.
I have started a blog over there as well just to try and keep me on track and share stuff.
So wish me luck hopefully I can start to feel better about myself and drop some kgs.
Anyway enough of the Boo Hoo woa is me crap I am over it.....
Let me share with you my evening last night.........
It started with the celebration of a good days work and some money in the wallet for a change. My little brother aka Starfish who is staying with us at the moment (thats a whole other story) and his friend lets call him Sea Cucumber hehehehe who was also spending the night at our house, my hubby and myself had enjoyed a couple of quiet drinks and hubby decided to shout everyone Chinese Food for dinner.....It was hot and delicious when it arrived and a wonderful treat thank you darling.
Now I dont know whether it was the beers, the hard days work or the MSG in the Chinese but OMG hubby's snoring was almost bordering on noise pollution, I tried the pillow over my head, I tried sleeping with my head at the end of the bed......nothing could drown it out so at about 2 am I had enough I took my pillows and headed out to the lounge....just at that moment Miss 2 decided to have a bad dream or something and woke up crying...sigh I put on the TV grab bubba a bottle and put her on her fold out lounge on the floor she finally goes back to sleep at 3 am I decide instead of risking her waking up again I would just leave her on her lounge, I nestle in on the couch and finally attempt to drift off to sleep with the sounds of the hubby's MSG induced rumblings muffled at least.
Ahhhh sleep at last now I dont know whether is was the absolute sleep deprivation which messes with your head at the best of times or what but just on the cusp of sleep I hear the dog biscuit bag (a huge bag of dog biscuits that was on special it has Dr Harry on the side so it must be good and as we have our dog and Starfish's horse dog as well hubby decided it was a good investment, I on the other hand are always concerned about the fact that mice and their larger cousins (shudder) rats are very partial to dog food was concerned about storing such a large bag....Look babe it has a self sealing strip it will be fine says hubby, self sealing strip that of course broke as soon as we opened the bag) anyway I digress....the bag crinkled IT CRINKLED I TELL YOU and I distinctly heard crunching..now I am awake fully all hope of sleep abandoned I assess the situation....me on the lounge at least am safe but my poor sleeping cherub is on the floor I jump up and figure I better move the baby I would have an everlasting nightmare if I disturbed the vile creature (the rat not the baby although sometimes......) anyway I was worried that it might bolt and run on her that would totally scar me for life I swear. I pick up the baby and put her to bed totally watching the whole time in case I am ambushed by dog biscuit loving ninja rats.....I grab a weapon from the laundry....a mop....and head back into the hot zone. I sneak in and turn the lights on, I deadbolt the front door.....I have no idea why lol. I grab the mop and slam it down onto the dog biscuit bag folding over the top blocking all escape routes.......what now???? I jam the mop against the bin and the counter stools...aha got you now you dirty rat!!!!
I figure it isnt going anywhere so I turn off the lights and head back to the couch....again I hear rustling I jump up and flick the lights on.....straining my ears to hear where it is coming from....nothing. I turn them off again....rustling...on....nothing....ARRRRRRG this literal Cat and Mouse game is driving me mad I turn them off again and just listen then the dogs bowl OUTSIDE moves so at this stage I am convincing my sleep deprived brain and racing heart that it is obviously outside the house and it not an immediate threat to me or my loved ones or the bag of biscuits in the kitchen....the dog outside can fend for himself and judging by his snoring he isnt worried.
Needless to say the mop on Dr Harry stayed firmly in place.....just...in...case.
4 am by this stage I have had maybe half an hour sleep tops the baby wakes again I bring her into the lounge and lay her with me on the couch (you cant be too careful), we both doze off to sleep....4.30 am hubby opens the bedroom door and professes he doesnt have a work shirt ironed totally oblivious to the mop prison he flicks on the kettle and wanders back to the bedroom.
Eventually the question is asked......"Whats the go with the mop?' I explain my horrific story expecting some kind of pat on the back for my brave act, for removing the baby from danger with no concern for my own safety, for going into battle alone with the Ninja rat but all I got was a chuckle and a "Dont be Silly".
Starfish grabs the bag takes it outside "Look I will show you" of course there was nothing but I so wanted something big black and hairy to come flying out Matrix style and attack him.
Needless to say the biscuits will be firmly ensconsed into tupperware containers today and the dogs bowl emptied....and NO MSG for hubby.....I am too old for this.....
Saturday, November 5, 2011
Monday, April 18, 2011
Today I am grateful for.............
On the weekend I finally got to read the article about the lady that started the 365 project and I found myself relating to the whole concept of looking for things to be grateful for on a daily basis instead of bitching and moaning and seeing only the bad in everything. Whilst the idea of taking a photo of one thing every day that you are grateful for is awesome I would get myself worked up about which is the best one or forget to do it altogether, so I have decided to just try to think of at least one thing everyday and even if something totally turns to shit I am going to find a positive in it I may or may not remember to share that with the world but I will try......so here are a few things that I have been thinking about........
I am grateful for everyone and everything in my life but it is the little things I guess that you have to go looking for.
For example Bubba decided from midnight till 5 am was the best playtime ever this morning, whilst exhausted and totally frustrated by her extreme happiness and joy at being let out of her slumber cage and set free to play and explore the sleeping houseI sat on the lounge and scowled at her sending evil eye vibes "Go to sleep kid, this is a ridiculous time of the day to be playing grrrrrrrr" She went about her destruction of the foam number hopscotch that Jemma had made earlier that night totally oblivious to my mumblings, then she started trying to jump on the numbers like she had seen her older sister doing and it was so darn cute I found my annoyance whilst still there was fading just a little and I thought OK lets just ride this out it is what it is she isnt screaming or riding the tanty train she just couldnt sleep and so when she doesnt sleep neither do I joys of Motherhood deal with it.
So I am grateful I got to spend one on one quality time with my baby daughter for 5 hours in the middle of the night I would of been more grateful for a different time frame but grateful all the same.
I am grateful for my children they are crazy and funny, frustrating and annoying, happy and healthy.
My husband, he is bossy and stubborn, larger than life, generous, honest, loving and all mine.
I am grateful that although I lost weeks of work research off my computer I didnt lose all of it.
I am grateful that I found a job that I can work from home with a great boss and a team of other mums that are funny and lovely that I just gel with, I havent made a million dollars (yet) but I am finding out about stuff I never knew existed and it works for me. www.whatson4littleones.com.au (shameless plug).
I am grateful for my brothers and sisters some of which I dont connect with anymore but I know they are there and I am grateful for the memories of the goodtimes. ( Although my brother only checks his facebook to see what misfortune has become me, I am grateful that he cares enough to check and laugh at my expense love your work Marky.)
I am grateful for Magic Erasers.
I am grateful for my mum.
I am grateful for the mother she is to me and the grandmother she is to my children, I am grateful for the memories she makes for them.
I am grateful for my Aunties the are so warm and funny and they loves me.
I am grateful for my friends
I am grateful for.......Google, Facebook and the cyberworld in general without which I wouldnt have met some amazing people or found some amazing things.
I am grateful for.....coffee.
But today I am just grateful to be healthy (a little toooo healthy) and surrounded by people that I love and who love me.
Stay tuned I am sure there will be something that would normally make my eye twitch and make me want to stick someone with a fork but I promise I will see the positive in it and find something to be grateful for.........
I am grateful for everyone and everything in my life but it is the little things I guess that you have to go looking for.
For example Bubba decided from midnight till 5 am was the best playtime ever this morning, whilst exhausted and totally frustrated by her extreme happiness and joy at being let out of her slumber cage and set free to play and explore the sleeping houseI sat on the lounge and scowled at her sending evil eye vibes "Go to sleep kid, this is a ridiculous time of the day to be playing grrrrrrrr" She went about her destruction of the foam number hopscotch that Jemma had made earlier that night totally oblivious to my mumblings, then she started trying to jump on the numbers like she had seen her older sister doing and it was so darn cute I found my annoyance whilst still there was fading just a little and I thought OK lets just ride this out it is what it is she isnt screaming or riding the tanty train she just couldnt sleep and so when she doesnt sleep neither do I joys of Motherhood deal with it.
So I am grateful I got to spend one on one quality time with my baby daughter for 5 hours in the middle of the night I would of been more grateful for a different time frame but grateful all the same.
I am grateful for my children they are crazy and funny, frustrating and annoying, happy and healthy.
My husband, he is bossy and stubborn, larger than life, generous, honest, loving and all mine.
I am grateful that although I lost weeks of work research off my computer I didnt lose all of it.
I am grateful that I found a job that I can work from home with a great boss and a team of other mums that are funny and lovely that I just gel with, I havent made a million dollars (yet) but I am finding out about stuff I never knew existed and it works for me. www.whatson4littleones.com.au (shameless plug).
I am grateful for my brothers and sisters some of which I dont connect with anymore but I know they are there and I am grateful for the memories of the goodtimes. ( Although my brother only checks his facebook to see what misfortune has become me, I am grateful that he cares enough to check and laugh at my expense love your work Marky.)
I am grateful for Magic Erasers.
I am grateful for my mum.
I am grateful for the mother she is to me and the grandmother she is to my children, I am grateful for the memories she makes for them.
I am grateful for my Aunties the are so warm and funny and they loves me.
I am grateful for my friends
I am grateful for.......Google, Facebook and the cyberworld in general without which I wouldnt have met some amazing people or found some amazing things.
I am grateful for.....coffee.
But today I am just grateful to be healthy (a little toooo healthy) and surrounded by people that I love and who love me.
Stay tuned I am sure there will be something that would normally make my eye twitch and make me want to stick someone with a fork but I promise I will see the positive in it and find something to be grateful for.........
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Morning Madness
3.00 am Dog starts throwing metal dog bowl around on concrete
3.05 am Get up and abuse dog and take metal bowl away
3.07 am Go back to bed
3.10 am Dog starts barking at some imaginary predator
3.15 am Baby wakes up crying
3.17 am Get up and abuse dog
3.18 am Sneak down hallway to make sure baby is asleep again.
3.25 am Go back to bed, kick little toe on @##$ blanket box AGAIN.
3.26 am Limp into bed clutching poor little pinkie toe
4.30 am Get smacked in face by husbands sudden outstreached hand
4.31 am Abuse husband and roll over
5.30 am Husband gets up complains of having no ironed shirts and gets into shower
5.35 am Ignore husband and roll over
6.00 am Baby starts yahooing and playing with Baby Tad....."If your happy and you know
clap your hands" (Note to self: Take cheery stoopid song singing toys out of cot)
6.10 am Start thinking about stupid blog
6.11 am Curse Jaala and her stupid blog obsession
6.12 am Get up head to bathroom for shower before facing the masses.
6.13 am Unmentionable......
6.14 am Get undressed close eyes and step on scales.......woo hoo lost 2kgs do a little naked
happy dance (not a good look...sorry for the horrible image now burned into your
soul). Its gonna be a good day.
6.16 am Jump in the shower wash hair run nit comb through.......just in case....no nits
and again with the naked happy dance ( image is already there so live with it)
6.30 am Husband comes in hurrying me up baby is up he has to go leaves bedroom door
open....Hello world.....now everyone has the naked image burned into their souls.
6.31 am Abuse husband for leaving door open.
6.45am Wake Adam up
6.46 am Wake Jemma up
6.50 am Change baby....curse husbands anti nappy changing crusade.
6.55 am Wake Jemma up
7.00 am Send baby in to wake Jemma up
7.05 am Go get baby and console Jemma after baby has smacked Jemma in the face with a
shoe
7.10 am Make baby breakfast
7.15 am Yell at Jemma to get up
7.20 am Yell at Jemma to get up and throw uniform at Jemma
7.25 am Adam yells at me to get Jemma up
7.26 am Adam yells at Jemma to get up
7.32 am Yell at Jemma to get up
7.40 am Jemma finally gets up
Get Laicee out of bathroom and close door
7.41 am Ask Jemma what she wants for breakfast
Get Laicee out of Adams room and close door
7.42 am Ask Jemma what she wants for breakfast
Get Laicee out of toilet Get shoe out of toilet and close door
7.43 am Ask Jemma what she wants for breakfast
Get Laicee out of cupboard under sink
Take cleaning product off Laicee (Keep polishing that award KT)
7.44 am Just make Jemma Cheese Toast for breakfast
7.46 am Make more cheese toast after Laicee stole Jemmas cheese toast
7.50 am Yell at Jemma to eat breakfast
7.55 am Organise lunches
8.01 am Yell at Jemma to eat breakfast
8.02 am Adam yells at Jemma to eat breakfast
8.05 am Remove Laicees cheese toast from my handbag, the Wii and the screen door.
8.10 am Adam asks "Can we go"
8.11 am Adam yells at Jemma to hurry up
8.12 am Yell at Jemma to brush her teeth
8.13 am Yell at Jemma to brush her teeth and put her shoes on.
Get Laicee out of Adams room and close the door AGAIN....make a mental note to
vaccuum up fishfood that Laicee has spilt all over Adams floor.
8.14 am Get Laicee out of toilet AGAIN
Get teatowel out of toilet
8.15 am Tell Jemma we are leaving, grab keys and handbag, get Laicee out of Jemmas
room......make mental note to clean up Honey Wheats that Laicee has spilt on
Jemmas floor.
8.16 am Yell at Jemma that we are leaving NOW
8.17 am Put shoes on, take shoe off, remove cheese toast from shoe, put shoe back on.
Go out to car, walk through dinosaur size spider web, do spider dance while looking
for dinosaur spider, assure baby that mummy's screaming and flailing around is ok.
Put baby in car, yell at Jemma that we are leaving.
Jemma comes out closes door
Ask Jemma where school bag is
Jemma shrugs and gets into car......Are you getting that Jemma is having one of
"Those" mornings
Turn car off get keys open door get Jemmas school bag, close door go back to car
8.20 am Finally leave the house..................
Drop Adam at school
Driving Jemma to school, shocked that she knows all the words to "She sounds like
sex on the radio" (Why do they insist on playing those songs right at school run
time) Turn radio down, get abused by Jemma as that is her "Favourite Song"
Jemma huffs and turns to stare angrily out the window, Jemma screams as
Laicee grabs a handful of ponytail and refuses to let go. Laicee screams as Jemma
claims back her ponytail amongst screaming at Laicee for pulling it.
Drop Jemma at school big kiss "Bye darling have a great day I love you"
Jemma grunts at me
Laicee gives Jemma kiss and waves happily.
Jemma gets out of car, Laicee screams when she realises Jemma is actually gone
8.45 am Arrive home access the damage from Cyclone Laicee Lou
Fish food in Adams room, Honey Wheats in Jemmas room, sultana trail from
kitchen to lounge room, several pairs of Jemmas knickers on the floor (damn her
knicker obsession).
Assess damage to the rest of the house...I swear I cleaned it yesterday
Kitchen is a bomb, breakfast dishes, toast crumbs, general crap everywhere.
Every teatowel pulled out of the draw....thanks Laicee
All the cushions of the lounges are on the floor (Why that happens constantly I
dont know), Laicees bottle upside down on the lounge mmmmm milk soaked lounge
cushions, toilet water soaked shoe in hallway (I was sure I put that in Laundry),
toilet water soaked teatowel in laundry. Every bed unmade, wet towels on the floor
in the bathroom and the bedrooms, dirty clothes dropped anywhere and
everywhere, dirty washing to be washed, clean washing to be folded, various food
stuffs on the floor and everywhere else........sigh
9.00 am Decide I need have a coffee first before I get started on Operation Clean House....
9.01 am In Laws arrive unannounced.................................................
3.05 am Get up and abuse dog and take metal bowl away
3.07 am Go back to bed
3.10 am Dog starts barking at some imaginary predator
3.15 am Baby wakes up crying
3.17 am Get up and abuse dog
3.18 am Sneak down hallway to make sure baby is asleep again.
3.25 am Go back to bed, kick little toe on @##$ blanket box AGAIN.
3.26 am Limp into bed clutching poor little pinkie toe
4.30 am Get smacked in face by husbands sudden outstreached hand
4.31 am Abuse husband and roll over
5.30 am Husband gets up complains of having no ironed shirts and gets into shower
5.35 am Ignore husband and roll over
6.00 am Baby starts yahooing and playing with Baby Tad....."If your happy and you know
clap your hands" (Note to self: Take cheery stoopid song singing toys out of cot)
6.10 am Start thinking about stupid blog
6.11 am Curse Jaala and her stupid blog obsession
6.12 am Get up head to bathroom for shower before facing the masses.
6.13 am Unmentionable......
6.14 am Get undressed close eyes and step on scales.......woo hoo lost 2kgs do a little naked
happy dance (not a good look...sorry for the horrible image now burned into your
soul). Its gonna be a good day.
6.16 am Jump in the shower wash hair run nit comb through.......just in case....no nits
and again with the naked happy dance ( image is already there so live with it)
6.30 am Husband comes in hurrying me up baby is up he has to go leaves bedroom door
open....Hello world.....now everyone has the naked image burned into their souls.
6.31 am Abuse husband for leaving door open.
6.45am Wake Adam up
6.46 am Wake Jemma up
6.50 am Change baby....curse husbands anti nappy changing crusade.
6.55 am Wake Jemma up
7.00 am Send baby in to wake Jemma up
7.05 am Go get baby and console Jemma after baby has smacked Jemma in the face with a
shoe
7.10 am Make baby breakfast
7.15 am Yell at Jemma to get up
7.20 am Yell at Jemma to get up and throw uniform at Jemma
7.25 am Adam yells at me to get Jemma up
7.26 am Adam yells at Jemma to get up
7.32 am Yell at Jemma to get up
7.40 am Jemma finally gets up
Get Laicee out of bathroom and close door
7.41 am Ask Jemma what she wants for breakfast
Get Laicee out of Adams room and close door
7.42 am Ask Jemma what she wants for breakfast
Get Laicee out of toilet Get shoe out of toilet and close door
7.43 am Ask Jemma what she wants for breakfast
Get Laicee out of cupboard under sink
Take cleaning product off Laicee (Keep polishing that award KT)
7.44 am Just make Jemma Cheese Toast for breakfast
7.46 am Make more cheese toast after Laicee stole Jemmas cheese toast
7.50 am Yell at Jemma to eat breakfast
7.55 am Organise lunches
8.01 am Yell at Jemma to eat breakfast
8.02 am Adam yells at Jemma to eat breakfast
8.05 am Remove Laicees cheese toast from my handbag, the Wii and the screen door.
8.10 am Adam asks "Can we go"
8.11 am Adam yells at Jemma to hurry up
8.12 am Yell at Jemma to brush her teeth
8.13 am Yell at Jemma to brush her teeth and put her shoes on.
Get Laicee out of Adams room and close the door AGAIN....make a mental note to
vaccuum up fishfood that Laicee has spilt all over Adams floor.
8.14 am Get Laicee out of toilet AGAIN
Get teatowel out of toilet
8.15 am Tell Jemma we are leaving, grab keys and handbag, get Laicee out of Jemmas
room......make mental note to clean up Honey Wheats that Laicee has spilt on
Jemmas floor.
8.16 am Yell at Jemma that we are leaving NOW
8.17 am Put shoes on, take shoe off, remove cheese toast from shoe, put shoe back on.
Go out to car, walk through dinosaur size spider web, do spider dance while looking
for dinosaur spider, assure baby that mummy's screaming and flailing around is ok.
Put baby in car, yell at Jemma that we are leaving.
Jemma comes out closes door
Ask Jemma where school bag is
Jemma shrugs and gets into car......Are you getting that Jemma is having one of
"Those" mornings
Turn car off get keys open door get Jemmas school bag, close door go back to car
8.20 am Finally leave the house..................
Drop Adam at school
Driving Jemma to school, shocked that she knows all the words to "She sounds like
sex on the radio" (Why do they insist on playing those songs right at school run
time) Turn radio down, get abused by Jemma as that is her "Favourite Song"
Jemma huffs and turns to stare angrily out the window, Jemma screams as
Laicee grabs a handful of ponytail and refuses to let go. Laicee screams as Jemma
claims back her ponytail amongst screaming at Laicee for pulling it.
Drop Jemma at school big kiss "Bye darling have a great day I love you"
Jemma grunts at me
Laicee gives Jemma kiss and waves happily.
Jemma gets out of car, Laicee screams when she realises Jemma is actually gone
8.45 am Arrive home access the damage from Cyclone Laicee Lou
Fish food in Adams room, Honey Wheats in Jemmas room, sultana trail from
kitchen to lounge room, several pairs of Jemmas knickers on the floor (damn her
knicker obsession).
Assess damage to the rest of the house...I swear I cleaned it yesterday
Kitchen is a bomb, breakfast dishes, toast crumbs, general crap everywhere.
Every teatowel pulled out of the draw....thanks Laicee
All the cushions of the lounges are on the floor (Why that happens constantly I
dont know), Laicees bottle upside down on the lounge mmmmm milk soaked lounge
cushions, toilet water soaked shoe in hallway (I was sure I put that in Laundry),
toilet water soaked teatowel in laundry. Every bed unmade, wet towels on the floor
in the bathroom and the bedrooms, dirty clothes dropped anywhere and
everywhere, dirty washing to be washed, clean washing to be folded, various food
stuffs on the floor and everywhere else........sigh
9.00 am Decide I need have a coffee first before I get started on Operation Clean House....
9.01 am In Laws arrive unannounced.................................................
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Why??
Why???
Why is the sky blue?
Why is the grass green??
Why do bad things happen to good people??
Why do good things happen to bad people??
Why couldnt Jack stay??
Why do people get cancer???
Why does everything that makes me fat taste so damn good??
Why are there always so many black jelly beans in my packet??? (I hate black jelly beans)
Why are some people born beautiful and others have been beaten mercilessly with the ugly stick??
Why do my children fight so much??
Why cant my children just do their jobs without a bitch fight??
Why cant Jemma get ready for school without a bitch fight??
Why cant Jemma take a bath without a bitch fight??
Why cant Jemma go to bed without a bitch fight??
Why does my dog insist on knocking over all the outdoor chairs and then sitting his hairy ass on them??
Why does every bird and bat in the neighbourhood poo on my car??
Why does the insect world have a hit out on me?? (It was a gecko last night and a pray mantas the night before)
Why cant I cook rice??
Why cant I lick my elbow??
Why do some people just whinge about everything??
Why do some friends feel the need to defriend you over something stupid??
Why do my bills always add up to more than my bank account??
Why does Jaala like my blog so much??
Why cant everyone see that Hannah Montana is just Miley Cyrus in a wig??
Why does mashed potato taste so good but is such a pain to make??
Why do all the people I want to be around live so far away??
Why do I spend all night wishing I could go to bed then stay up late??
Why does joining a gym always seem like a good idea at the time??
Why does a fly land in your last glass of Chardy??
Why does my ironing pile go away only to come back after the washing pile goes away??
Why is there a million channels on Foxtel and nothing to watch??
Why do I give Laicee chocolate toast when I am wearing white pants??
Why did Tahli get glandular fever just when she was really enjoying school??
Why does Laicee call Grandma "Bum"?? (Well I actually know the answer to that one)
Why am I writing this blog??
Why cant I stay in bed all day and read a book??
Why cant weightloss be easier??
Why do I have to say things a hundred times before anyone listens??
Why cant I be rich and powerful??
Why does Laicee insist on knocking down all the piles of folded washing??
Why does Laicee insist on wearing everyones knickers on her head??? (Dirty or clean eww)
Why?? Why?? Why??
If you know the answers to any or all of these questions be sure to let me know ok?
Why is the sky blue?
Why is the grass green??
Why do bad things happen to good people??
Why do good things happen to bad people??
Why couldnt Jack stay??
Why do people get cancer???
Why does everything that makes me fat taste so damn good??
Why are there always so many black jelly beans in my packet??? (I hate black jelly beans)
Why are some people born beautiful and others have been beaten mercilessly with the ugly stick??
Why do my children fight so much??
Why cant my children just do their jobs without a bitch fight??
Why cant Jemma get ready for school without a bitch fight??
Why cant Jemma take a bath without a bitch fight??
Why cant Jemma go to bed without a bitch fight??
Why does my dog insist on knocking over all the outdoor chairs and then sitting his hairy ass on them??
Why does every bird and bat in the neighbourhood poo on my car??
Why does the insect world have a hit out on me?? (It was a gecko last night and a pray mantas the night before)
Why cant I cook rice??
Why cant I lick my elbow??
Why do some people just whinge about everything??
Why do some friends feel the need to defriend you over something stupid??
Why do my bills always add up to more than my bank account??
Why does Jaala like my blog so much??
Why cant everyone see that Hannah Montana is just Miley Cyrus in a wig??
Why does mashed potato taste so good but is such a pain to make??
Why do all the people I want to be around live so far away??
Why do I spend all night wishing I could go to bed then stay up late??
Why does joining a gym always seem like a good idea at the time??
Why does a fly land in your last glass of Chardy??
Why does my ironing pile go away only to come back after the washing pile goes away??
Why is there a million channels on Foxtel and nothing to watch??
Why do I give Laicee chocolate toast when I am wearing white pants??
Why did Tahli get glandular fever just when she was really enjoying school??
Why does Laicee call Grandma "Bum"?? (Well I actually know the answer to that one)
Why am I writing this blog??
Why cant I stay in bed all day and read a book??
Why cant weightloss be easier??
Why do I have to say things a hundred times before anyone listens??
Why cant I be rich and powerful??
Why does Laicee insist on knocking down all the piles of folded washing??
Why does Laicee insist on wearing everyones knickers on her head??? (Dirty or clean eww)
Why?? Why?? Why??
If you know the answers to any or all of these questions be sure to let me know ok?
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Just randomness for Jaala
Have you ever wondered where flies go at night??? Is it the same place mozzies go during the day??? Do they have like a time clock where they clock in and out????
This is just one of the many many random thoughts that plague me........I mean who cares seriously. I think it is a genetic thing my family is completely random I think sometimes our friends just keep us around for the entertainment value......it certainly isnt for our money lol
Has anyone really looked at a Plover lately?? You know those really nasty birds that will chase you if you get too close to them, we have a pair that hang out in our backyard just staring at us watching waiting for I am not sure what, they give my husband the absolute creeps personally I think they look like Ringo Starr I can actually imagine them talking with a British accent telling us to "Sod Off".
I love it when you are walking along and you trip up on your own feet (Another family trait....clumsiness) but you look down and kick the ground at some imaginary stick or rock to get it out the way so some other poor soul doesnt trip on it.
I love it when you go to get the baby up from her nap and get hit in the face by a shit bat as soon as you open the door wow how can something so small smell soooooo bad. For those of you that dont know a "Shit Bat" is that smell that smacks you in the face when you walk in to the toilet after someone has "been" eeeewwwwwwwwww.
Did you know that sultanas "come out" the other end looking like grapes so that is proof I guess that they once were actual grapes.
I have been wondering why I have been having so much bad luck lately, well there was that mirror carrying chinaman with the black cat in his bag that I hit the other day.....jokes jokes no cats were harmed. But seriously I am pretty sure I have been a good person so Kharma shouldnt have a beef with me but then I remembered when Tahli was about 9 months old she pulled a full length mirror down on herself completely shattering it so maybe it is a mix of the fact that it was a full length mirror so you get 10 years bad luck instead of the standard 7, the fact that I wasnt paying attention (see I have been after that Mother of the Year Award for years) maybe I get an extra 5 years for bad mothering or something....whatever it is I figure that I should be up for some good luck pretty soon huh.
My luck seems to go something like this;
My car will run out of petrol the day before payday.
My daughter will tell me she has a costume parade the next day at school when she is going to bed that night.
My toddler loves Teletubbies.......groan.
My toddler has decided that she can feed herself ......at the same time she has decided she hates the highchair.......double groan.
The missing red sock turns up in the white load of washing.
The mother in law...code name: Viper....always turns up on a no housework being done day.
I will run into someone I know on a quick bread and milk dash to the shop on a bad hair no make up day..
The hairdresser will find head lice in my hair on the busiest day of the year at the salon.
I get my dream job then find out I am pregnant.
I seriously could go on and on and on......but I am also very lucky as well I have 4 healthy happy kids that I have managed not to seriously harm well not physically anyway well ok sometimes physically but not intentionally and nothing long term.....I am sure the therapists of the future will know all about me.....It will go something like...."well it all started when my mother........dropped me down the stairs, lost me in the shopping centre, smacked my face into the coffee table while giving me a horsey ride, accidently stood me in a bullants nest then dipped me in a freezing esky after said bullants bit me 200 times, got the time wrong and forgot to pick me up after school camp, sat me on the waters edge as a freak mini tsunami came in......the therapist will smile sympathically while secretly thinking "Cha-ching this ones gonna need months maybe even years of work"
This is just one of the many many random thoughts that plague me........I mean who cares seriously. I think it is a genetic thing my family is completely random I think sometimes our friends just keep us around for the entertainment value......it certainly isnt for our money lol
Has anyone really looked at a Plover lately?? You know those really nasty birds that will chase you if you get too close to them, we have a pair that hang out in our backyard just staring at us watching waiting for I am not sure what, they give my husband the absolute creeps personally I think they look like Ringo Starr I can actually imagine them talking with a British accent telling us to "Sod Off".
I love it when you are walking along and you trip up on your own feet (Another family trait....clumsiness) but you look down and kick the ground at some imaginary stick or rock to get it out the way so some other poor soul doesnt trip on it.
I love it when you go to get the baby up from her nap and get hit in the face by a shit bat as soon as you open the door wow how can something so small smell soooooo bad. For those of you that dont know a "Shit Bat" is that smell that smacks you in the face when you walk in to the toilet after someone has "been" eeeewwwwwwwwww.
Did you know that sultanas "come out" the other end looking like grapes so that is proof I guess that they once were actual grapes.
I have been wondering why I have been having so much bad luck lately, well there was that mirror carrying chinaman with the black cat in his bag that I hit the other day.....jokes jokes no cats were harmed. But seriously I am pretty sure I have been a good person so Kharma shouldnt have a beef with me but then I remembered when Tahli was about 9 months old she pulled a full length mirror down on herself completely shattering it so maybe it is a mix of the fact that it was a full length mirror so you get 10 years bad luck instead of the standard 7, the fact that I wasnt paying attention (see I have been after that Mother of the Year Award for years) maybe I get an extra 5 years for bad mothering or something....whatever it is I figure that I should be up for some good luck pretty soon huh.
My luck seems to go something like this;
My car will run out of petrol the day before payday.
My daughter will tell me she has a costume parade the next day at school when she is going to bed that night.
My toddler loves Teletubbies.......groan.
My toddler has decided that she can feed herself ......at the same time she has decided she hates the highchair.......double groan.
The missing red sock turns up in the white load of washing.
The mother in law...code name: Viper....always turns up on a no housework being done day.
I will run into someone I know on a quick bread and milk dash to the shop on a bad hair no make up day..
The hairdresser will find head lice in my hair on the busiest day of the year at the salon.
I get my dream job then find out I am pregnant.
I seriously could go on and on and on......but I am also very lucky as well I have 4 healthy happy kids that I have managed not to seriously harm well not physically anyway well ok sometimes physically but not intentionally and nothing long term.....I am sure the therapists of the future will know all about me.....It will go something like...."well it all started when my mother........dropped me down the stairs, lost me in the shopping centre, smacked my face into the coffee table while giving me a horsey ride, accidently stood me in a bullants nest then dipped me in a freezing esky after said bullants bit me 200 times, got the time wrong and forgot to pick me up after school camp, sat me on the waters edge as a freak mini tsunami came in......the therapist will smile sympathically while secretly thinking "Cha-ching this ones gonna need months maybe even years of work"
Sunday, March 6, 2011
A few of my favorite things
Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens??
Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens???
Brown paper packages tied up with string????
Those are her favorite things???......wow she really needs to get out more!!
These are a few of my favourite things;
No fighting, No yelling, No God how I hate you
My siblings I love you now how can I help you
My children not screaming and throwing hard things
These are a few of my favorite things......
No Headlice No Vomit No Raging high fevers
My children all sleeping, No listening to Beiber
Dishes all done and the kitchen all clean
These are a few of my favorite things.....
A cold glass of Chardy or even a coffee
A nice box of chockies I dont mind the toffees
A soak in the bath tub without the dirt rings
These are a few of my favourite things....
A trip to the toilet without the small toddler
A shower alone would seem somewhat odd now
Home from the shop without "what did you bring"
These are a few of my favourite things......
No feltpen on carpet, No chocolate on carseat
No washing in laundry now that one you cant beat
No crashes or scratches and maybe no head dings
These are a few of my favorite things.
When the dog barks (and wakes up the baby)
When the bee stings (and causes a foot swell)
When I am feeling tired sad and just not that well
I simply remember my favourite things and then I dont feel so bad
Big sloppy kisses and heads on my shoulder
Big hugs and little hugs both younger and older
I love you the best mum that makes my heart sing
These are my very most favorite things....
Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens???
Brown paper packages tied up with string????
Those are her favorite things???......wow she really needs to get out more!!
These are a few of my favourite things;
No fighting, No yelling, No God how I hate you
My siblings I love you now how can I help you
My children not screaming and throwing hard things
These are a few of my favorite things......
No Headlice No Vomit No Raging high fevers
My children all sleeping, No listening to Beiber
Dishes all done and the kitchen all clean
These are a few of my favorite things.....
A cold glass of Chardy or even a coffee
A nice box of chockies I dont mind the toffees
A soak in the bath tub without the dirt rings
These are a few of my favourite things....
A trip to the toilet without the small toddler
A shower alone would seem somewhat odd now
Home from the shop without "what did you bring"
These are a few of my favourite things......
No feltpen on carpet, No chocolate on carseat
No washing in laundry now that one you cant beat
No crashes or scratches and maybe no head dings
These are a few of my favorite things.
When the dog barks (and wakes up the baby)
When the bee stings (and causes a foot swell)
When I am feeling tired sad and just not that well
I simply remember my favourite things and then I dont feel so bad
Big sloppy kisses and heads on my shoulder
Big hugs and little hugs both younger and older
I love you the best mum that makes my heart sing
These are my very most favorite things....
ebay and headlice.
Have you ever sold anything on ebay???? It is a wonderful source for getting rid of all the crap sort of like a online garage sale really. BUT I think it is also a hang out for all the weirdos we have recently had a clean out and sold some stuff on there which is really handy but people just ask the stupidest questions. No I dont want to swap it for a boat, a goat or your mother in law. Yes it will play on your PSP it is a PSP game, No the shoes are a size 7 I dont have them in a size 8 or 10 what am I a shoe shop arrrrrg but it all ended well now to just wait for the payments and head to the post office.....mmmm maybe I could of used a goat after all.
They say that all of Gods creatures are here for a reason and each and every one has a purpose........Well I personally disagree, I want to know just what the purpose or the reason for my number one enemy........HEADLICE. We have recently had an extremely hardy family of the little critters. They hitch a ride home from school with Jemma and poor Jemma but everyone is always a little suss about what might be lurking in her hair and we all tend to hug her with our heads away from hers BUT the cunning little beggars are on to this and have jumped onto Little Miss Winkie Face Laicee and she is off the scale in the cutesy factor and gets more cuddles than anyone else in the house plus the standard treatment doesnt apply to her NO headlice treatment for the baby so they have a chance to take over the house and they have. I have deliced Laicee at least 3 times but I am still finding the little @#$% I have combed and combed and combed she is becoming a little pissed by this which is making the process even harder. Every member even Daddy has been affected much to his absolute shock and horror when I told him just to be on the safe side he should run the comb through his hair and he found a crawly I swear it was like he found dog poo in there, for all his mocking and laughing at everyone else in their lovely green plastic hats sitting with stinking nit treatments in our hair......kharma is such a bitch huh hehehehe. Knock on wood I think this round has been won though no little creatures have been detected for a few days. I do feel a little obsessive about it though the kid can not come near me without me checking and picking bits out of her like some monkey at the zoo lol. I cant let my guard down though they are sneaky like ninja and are just waiting for an opportunity to strike again....I bet you are scratching right now you are arent you.
They say that all of Gods creatures are here for a reason and each and every one has a purpose........Well I personally disagree, I want to know just what the purpose or the reason for my number one enemy........HEADLICE. We have recently had an extremely hardy family of the little critters. They hitch a ride home from school with Jemma and poor Jemma but everyone is always a little suss about what might be lurking in her hair and we all tend to hug her with our heads away from hers BUT the cunning little beggars are on to this and have jumped onto Little Miss Winkie Face Laicee and she is off the scale in the cutesy factor and gets more cuddles than anyone else in the house plus the standard treatment doesnt apply to her NO headlice treatment for the baby so they have a chance to take over the house and they have. I have deliced Laicee at least 3 times but I am still finding the little @#$% I have combed and combed and combed she is becoming a little pissed by this which is making the process even harder. Every member even Daddy has been affected much to his absolute shock and horror when I told him just to be on the safe side he should run the comb through his hair and he found a crawly I swear it was like he found dog poo in there, for all his mocking and laughing at everyone else in their lovely green plastic hats sitting with stinking nit treatments in our hair......kharma is such a bitch huh hehehehe. Knock on wood I think this round has been won though no little creatures have been detected for a few days. I do feel a little obsessive about it though the kid can not come near me without me checking and picking bits out of her like some monkey at the zoo lol. I cant let my guard down though they are sneaky like ninja and are just waiting for an opportunity to strike again....I bet you are scratching right now you are arent you.
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